In light of what’s happening at the moment, so many of us are questioning our enough-ness.
On top of the hundred things we’re trying to adapt to and cope with, we’ve added questioning if we’re enough to the list.
I’ve no doubt that over the last couple of weeks you’ve questioned whether you’re doing, being or trying, enough. I know this because I’ve been doing it too.
I’m writing this to put an idea to you. To think in a different way. A way that doesn’t involve the self deprecation we’re all too familiar with.
As a society, as a nation even, we’re going through something completely unprecedented. There’s no ‘how to’ guide when it comes to navigating this. Changes are difficult to acclimatise to at the best of times and there’s no denying that we’ve been dealt a difficult hand.
All aspects of our lives have been uprooted and although it’s a comfort to know that it’s happening to everyone, a comfort is all it is.
It doesn’t take away the stress of it happening. Nobody can live another person’s experience - no matter how hard we try.
It’s not selfish or silly if all of this gets too much sometimes. Allow yourself and others to feel that.
Last week, my friends and I were talking about the situation. I watched (god bless Zoom) as she cried and questioned whether what she was doing was enough.
Her stresses are the same as most of us; shopping, working from home, family, activities, her daughter.
She was annoyed at herself for struggling to do her job from home, whilst looking after a little person who she needs to keep occupied, satisfied and educated.
“I should know how to do this.”
Sound familiar? I’m here to tell you that no you shouldn’t. Nobody knows how to do any of this.
During her mini meltdown, another friend said “maybe enough is different every day” and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since.
What if, rather than trying to do or be what we think is enough, we just take each day at a time. Let the day decide what ‘enough’ is because, surely, there can’t be one definitive measure of 'enough' to be met each day.
Yesterday you might have woken at the crack of dawn, sprung out of bed, smashed your to do list, flawlessly parented, achieved everything you set out to do and more, beat your exercise PB, cooked a Michelin star dinner, practised self care A N D spent time outdoors. Fabulous.
Maybe today, all you’ve managed to do was wake up, eat rubbish, feel trapped, cry a bit and succumb to the stress of the situation.
Less fabulous, yes, but equally as O K.
Maybe that's today’s enough and tomorrow’s will be different again?
We need balance. Nobody can be entirely one thing all the time.
My point? Give yourself a break. It’s hard. No one has a clue what’s going on. None of us are supposed to know how to do any of this. If you say you do, you're either lying or selfish for not sharing your secrets with us all.
Look after yourselves. X